The scent of Sean, seaweed and spice, filled my nostrils while the rest of the world hovered on the periphery of my sleep.
I woke with a start, taking deep, trembling breaths as I fought against the nightmare, swirling water, pulling me down and down and down. I ran my hands through my hair, damp and snarled from sweat. When I swung my legs out of bed, I smoothed the t-shirt over my thighs, ‘Sean, Sean, he’s all brawn’ in big blue letters over the white knit fabric.
My hands caught on the fabric, my palms rough with callouses and broken blisters from hanging onto the bars. My breath hitched before I closed my eyes and focused on breathing. I had nothing to be afraid of in my room, books and clothes kicked to the edges of the floor, my computer piled with headphones, midi keyboard and other musical apparatus. The quilt was cheerful, happy like the sun shining in my window, the first sunny morning in a week.
I swallowed hard and stood, unable to push back the panic. I needed Sean. A few months ago I would have called him, but I didn’t have to, not when he was sleeping in my living room. I grabbed my oversize sweat pants off the floor and tugged them on as I hopped across the floor. I would sneak down and see him, sprawled across the couch, feet sticking out of the too-small blanket. That’s all I needed.I turned my handle, the door swung open, and Sean fell onto my bedroom floor. I stared at him while he blinked at me blearily from his prone position
AAAAAGGGGHHHHHHH I love this one so much. I hope you do too. It will need a few more rounds of edits, but it's amazingly whole and alive. I think I will publish it before next spring if all goes well.